A City Break in Stockholm

for the tippex in my diary - i thank you

for the bliss of shredder-shed responsibilities – i thank you

for digital joy of recycle bin deletions – i thank you

for the sheer consoling splendour of isolation – i thank you

 

first you teased with all-encompassing threat

then you chained me to my own radiating mind

you took away half my face

you tied a bargepole to my wrists

you broadcast endless reports of your own cruelty

you made me rehearse my last breath

 

for winnowing my chaff-choked time – i thank you

for this unexpected necessary ecdysis – i thank you

for revealing peace in cellular routine – i thank you

for forcing me to pay attention – i thank you

 

you indulged yourself with shape-shifting tricks

you mixed subtle lies amongst your inexorable truths

you pretended to let me go then manacled me anew

you made me dream of the luxury of choice

you tried your best to make solitude lonely

such an ultimate brutality of callous ambition

 

so for offering the chance to disarm you – i thank you

for adding to the list of my survivals – i thank you

for compelling me to love my time and my space – i thank you

for sparing me – so far – i thank you




Ted Eames, 2022